BGC Countdown: 16 days

The Big Gay Cruise is 16 days away. Let's roll some numbers and current mental and emotional statuses:

47.7lbs - The weight of the big suitcase with all the clothes I thought I would take MINUS two pairs of shoes I'm considering, two pairs of jeans I'm considering, all socks and underwear I'm taking. Harness is packed and going, no matter what.

2 - number of suitcases Jeff and I are bringing each. One large one to check (and we're flying Delta so we're assuming we're going to lose them for the first couple days) and one pair of smaller wheels as a carry-on with a few days worth of clothes and accessories.

3 - Books I'm brining so far besides the Blue Guide travel books covering Spain, Rome, Florence, Greece, and Turkey. I'm taking old favorites: The Virgin Suicides, The Probably Future, Blackbird House. I was going to take the Gormanghast Trilogy but it's too damn heavy and might seem imposing to all the ab-tastic muscle heads that will be kicking sand in my face.

20.1lb - the weight of the delivery from Toomey's Mardi Gras supply. I'd ordered four masks and just a few beads to cover the Mardi Gras and Venetian Carnivale parties being thrown over the course of the two cruises. I'm unclear exactly what weighs 20.1 lbs other than a huge mis-ordering I did on beads. I've rechecked my invoice to make sure I only ordered a single dozen of something rather than a single gross. It was delivered yesterday up at home so we'll find out. Not sure where all that crap will go. A very nice guy I've been corresponding with who is going on the cruise too mentioned that we don't even have to bring our own beads because the ship supplies them. Now he tells me.

13 - The number of regular, unadorned medium and small t-shirts in various colors, though ranging mostly through the blue and green spectrum. I don't think I need this many but I'm figuring that I'll be using them as my day/excursion wear and changing into Cha Cha Wear at night time so I need all thirteen.

11 - dressed, fagged-up, decorated, bedazzled, and slogan t-shirts that I'm taking. This would meld into my Cha Cha wear depending on the circumstance, state of mind, and company. These include our Charo "Cuchi Cuchi" tee's we just bedazzled this past weekend (which, btw, is easier to do by hand then use the damn piece of plastic application shit known as "The Bedazzler". Save your money and just buy the rhinestones and do it by hand). This also includes my "Xanadude" shirt I bought from Richard (which might get some Bedazzling this weekend) which is in the running for one of the two White Parties, and my Batman Begins insigna shirt.

2 - cockrings that fit on my harness. Still can't decide which one is more comfortable in dancing mode for a long period of time.

4 - Long sleeved button down Cha Cha shirts that I tailored myself over the weekend after refusing to pay anyone else to do it. Seriously, how hard could it have been to run a seam and throw in a couple darts. I got so proficient at it that by the end of the weekend, I was pinning them on myself rather than making Jeff stand around and act like my sewing form.

4 1/2 - pairs of variously hued cargo shorts of varying length. The 1/2 covers the pair of cargo pants that will zip off to form shorts. Apparently the Catholic Church doesn't want a bunch of stickie tourists polluting St. Peter's with exposed knees.

Currently worrying about: Having some kind of city-wide black out on the 24th that would cancel our flight to Barcelona, causing us to miss our ship. Ridiculous, I know, but that is where my mind wanders these days. Also, how much Valium I'll need to take to sleep through the seven hours in coach class.